January 9, we said hi. I remembered how it was disturbing then, when a complete stranger was showing so much interest in you when you're usually seen right through like the air. Wow that's a first.
In the subsequent weeks, god told him to show me what unrequited love is, but I was too blind to see the big picture. Late nights rendezvous, adrenaline rush, endorphins and butterflies in the stomach. Short sighted, these were all I was after.
Then god made me believe that maybe, just maybe, I have the ability to love too? & damn, I do! But what? My ego was bigger than anything else. I refused to admit that I'm in love with him.
But he continued to love unrequitedly. Sometimes it's too surreal I don't know if I'm living in a story or in real life.
All these while, god arranged a distractor in the story too. And as blind as I was, I mistook the distractor as the protagonist.
God saw that I was unappreciative, and thought that he had suffered enough. So we bade goodbye on April 9.
This is really weird. I remember being unhappy then. But now I can't even recollect how unhappy was unhappy then. All I remember is the things he had done for me. I am slowly recollecting. And the kind of happiness I feel now was something that was missing then. How can the same thing feel so different in 2 different time frames?
Although I have lost this love. I am grateful that it has happened. Through this lost I have learnt my lessons.
Being the female lead had disrupted the other aspects of my life quite a bit. I think I might just be at my rock bottom now. But it's okay you know. You can work your way up again. One day you'll be back.
I want to give you a hug so bad. But I know I can't do it any more now. I hope god would arrange the best girl for you soon.
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